4-13-2025 MY WEEK: a note on homeownership and gender roles

 i hope you girls put your records on, now tell me your favorite song! yesterday was national record store day. aside from homeowner growing pains (a new washer gets installed because the old one broke, then you discover another leak in the bathroom and can't use it, what a classic!) and running around laundromats and other errands, sib and i took some time between the errands to stop at the local record den. sib and i are big believers in thrifting older records. sib states that "buying brand new ones just doesn't feel natural". i agree, the natural wear and tear, the obscurity of old records, the... patina? just adds a certain charm. nevertheless, new or old, we were supporting local rather than purchasing new records at target, barnes and noble, or an urban outfitters. now i decided to celebrate early by taking a look at the record selection at the thrift, and i'll share my findings in my faves of the week.

to say a word about homeownership, sib and i have been homeowners to our lovely condo for about 3 and a half years now. being roommates has been perfect since we were built in roommates since birth, but the exciting thing is the freedom of decorating. i am a big believer in maximalism, and my space needs to reflect it. while the chores may be a constant struggle at home, we both value the beauty of our space, adding little ideas (and a giant signed celine dion poster that is awaiting to be hung). i may have mentioned in previous entries how i love hosting. this is true for both sib and i. no matter the hassle of purchasing food and wine, and preparing days ahead, it is our favorite stressor and we will never say no to a party or brunch idea we can host. 

my humble record corner and sleeve display

now decorating and hosting are mostly the beauty of having your own home with no one to nag you (parents). but there is the need for responsibility, by not ignoring your bills, or potential breaks and leaks. it's expensive, it is time consuming. a random leak out of the sink can pop out of nowhere. you just have to be ready for it. a home is like a pet. it doesn't speak but there's signs when something is wrong. and you don't want to ignore those signs. and like a pet, you may not understand it, you might not know the cause, and it is hard to be proactive. you just have to be ready to spend money on these necessities, and you most certainly have to be ready to research best professionals to help (in the sea of incompetence).

the topic of incompetence - because of these issues we're dealing with at home, is a topic we chewed up and spat out during our rides to the laundromat, and even ranting with our mom. have you ever seen those memes urging people to stop being influencers and start being electricians and plumbers? because the lack of expertise is a serious epidemic out here. here's an excerpt on a similar concern on cooking, written by anthony bourdain, that encapsulates how our society misunderstood the feminist movement, and cut all of society from learning skills, regardless of gender:

back in the dark ages, young women and girls were automatically segregated off to home-economics classes, where they were indoctrinated with the belief that cooking was one of the essential skill sets for responsible citizenry - or, more to the point, useful housewifery. when they began asking the obvious question - "why me and not him?" - it signaled the beginning of the end of any institutionalized teaching of the end of any institutionalized teaching of cooking skills. women rejected the idea that they should be designated, simply by virtue of their gender, to perform what would be called, in a professional situation, service jobs, and rightly refused to submit. "home ed" became the most glaring illustration of everything wrong with the gender politics of the time. quickly identified as an instrument of subjugation, it became an instant anachronism. knowing how to cook, or visibly enjoy it, became an embarrassment for an enlightened young woman, a reminder of prior servitude.

males were hardly leaping to pick up the slack, as cooking had been so wrong-headedly portrayed as "for girls" - or, equally as bad, "for queers".

what this meant, though, is that by the end of the '60s, nobody was cooking. and soon, as gordon ramsay has pointed out rather less delicately a while back, no one even remembered how.

bourdain goes on to explain how this tipping point in history could've promoted cooking for all genders. and that's where society messed up feminism and gender equality. instead of adding skills to both, we take away what's beneficial. it's like when guys say they can then "rightfully" punch a girl and she should be able to take the hit. that's not the point, losers. the point is: no one should be hit - period - especially not because of their gender. isn't it sad that we have to choose between weaponized incompetence and domestic violence? 

alright, enough of the deep topics, friday boyfriend and i went on a double date with our fave bestie couple, and we got all you can eat sushi and hotpot, alongside strong lychee and mango -tini's for the girls. the gluttony of friday is my sign i need to go and confess before easter. the meal was way too good,and way too hedonistic. saturday night we opted for sobriety and met with bestie victoria for kratom tea at kava sol. while the vibes were super cute, do not forget we are paying for juice. we did walk out with a bit of a god complex while passing the sleazy dive bars. 

fits of the week

what a week it was for a debut in sleeveless tops, still safely guarded with cardigans (one of sib's took the spotlight). it was a week to be comfy but still not lazy.

monday i layered up in greyscale, during a long work day - then stopping at menards and home depot for the over-mentioned washer. good thing there's layers because there was some random snow that day. the top was my mom's part of a set, the pants were from croatia, and the cardigan is borrowed from sib.

🠄tuesday i wore a faux silk blouse from target, heavy duty l l bean jeans and steve madden oxfords.

tuesday evening we had a call to thrift, and i swapped the blouse for a simpler sweater, but equally bright.🠆

 

wednesday  at work i wore some thrifted slacks and a black t shirt, and borrowed that cardigan. it was the staple of the week (anyone in the mental health world has to have the designated therapy cardigan).

thursday at work i wore another sleeveless top, snakeskin pattern, sib's cardigan, and american eagle oversized corduroy pants. 

while i might've given sib's cardigan a break, i surely continued with various sleeveless tops and cardigan layers. 

friday for work look.

for our double date friday night, one must respect the laws of how much you're eating and drinking, and respect your body to prioritize comfort over anything else. the sweatshirt is an easter themed one so i guess it was cute enough.

while running errands and loads of laundry on saturday, i opted for another simple look, a black hoodie, uniqlo bag (very utilitarian), my skechers and sib's jeans.

saturday night i finally had a chance to be maximalist - place and time! - and wore a mesh bodysuit under a simple t shirt, dark wash jeans, tons of necklaces and my cuffs.

lastly, for palm sunday i was very late to church (blame it on the washer) and wore some slacks, loafers and a black sweater with a slit. wasn't sure how appropriate it would be for mass (i have seen some questionable looks if you believe in church dress code), so i played it safe and kept the light puffer on.

projects of the week

while sib was going back and forth on beginning new sewing projects, toward the end of the week she put a pause on it. she's going on a two week vacay to see the parents and decided to follow back up on the projects after she returns.

in the meanwhile, i took almost every day out of the week to dedicate some time and make more work to decide what would be the best picture to submit to the local art festival.

a watercolor picture of the hometown ancient church

for now i plan to submit this one

i'm not submitting this one
 this one's a gift to boyfriend as he gave me inspo on it

purchased oil pastels and tested them out. 
a landscape of a walk to one of the beaches

what am i looking forward to this week?

as a practicing catholic, this is a busy week for me, so i will be going to church for a few consecutive days doing all the traditions we do for easter time.

i'm doing airport drive duty and dropping off sib to the airport. friday i have work off so i'm hoping the weather is nice enough to do some outdoor activities. will be missing sib's company, but i'm excited for vogue adria and interview magazines as souvenirs!